MANY middle-aged women go through a phase during which they try to prove that the effects of aging have not set in. They wear clothes that are not age appropriate and do not behave accordingly either. Some wear high heels, colorful abayas and trendy dresses that are more appropriate for teenagers and young women. These women are often mothers themselves and it is often the case that their children are embarrassed by their behavior. Al-Riyadh daily reports on this cultural behavior. Many people believe that a mother who acts like a teen wants to live a life she never had and do the things she could not do 15 or 20 years ago. According to Dr. Farhan Al-Eneizi, assistant professor of counseling psychology at Hail University, each age phase has certain characteristics that are different to subsequent or previous phases. “Women who dress, act and talk like teens have had unfulfilled and unsatisfied needs since they were teens. These needs overwhelm them when they grow older and they are unable to understand the appropriate behavior for their age,” said Al-Eneizi. “Some middle-aged women feel pressured by their current age phase and think they cannot cope with the role this phase entails and they will fail. As a result, they start to act like young girls and behave in a way not appropriate for their age,” he added. Fahad Al-Otaibi, sociologist and director of Hail Protection Center, said even men go through such a phase but in a different way. “Some old men download clips that have explicit content. Women who are in their mid-ages might rebel against this phase because they want to believe they're still young and they aren't growing old. It's no surprise that some women act younger than their age; it's in their feminine nature,” Al-Otaibi said. “If sons or daughters do not know how to deal with their mothers who constantly embarrass them by their behavior, they should try and have their maternal uncles to talk them out of it,” Al-Otaibi added. Khairiya Al-Zabn, sociologist at Hail University, said most mothers who act in this way did not have compassionate and kind parents and were neglected when they were young. Such women, Al-Zabn claimed, live in a world of dreams where they think they are still young and start doing things that do not reflect their age. “Advice doesn't work in most cases with mothers who act like their daughters and put on heavy makeup and wear high heels and attractive abayas. The mother's actions and people's reaction to it, which is always negative, might cause psychological problems and confusion for her sons and daughters who will prefer not to be seen with their mother in public so they do not have to hear comments that will hurt their feelings,” said Al-Zabn.
