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Common pitfalls for men
Published in The Saudi Gazette on 22 - 04 - 2016

Islam should have more of an internal influence on the character of its follower than its effect on the Muslim's external appearance. For a Muslim man, treating his wife and children kindly, taking care of his elderly parents, and spending generously on those in need, are more important than the physical matters, for example, the length of his hair or growing a beard.
To follow the example of Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) means being a gentle and understanding husband, a loving father, a good friend, a kind leader, and a trustworthy employee.
Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) was sent by Allah to teach us how to live a life of goodness towards others and piety, and to worship no other than Allah.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "I have only been sent to perfect good moral character."
While certain codes of dress should not take precedence over one's character and conduct, there are certain guidelines Muslim men should follow. This article can serve as a reminder for Muslim men on certain dress rules or lifestyle habits that are forbidden and those that are encouraged.
. Wearing silk. When visiting the US, it is painstaking to find my son and husband a nice necktie that is not made of silk! Wearing silk for men is strictly forbidden in Islam, so we avoid buying the men in our family a necktie that contains silk. Abu Musa reported that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "Gold and silk have been permitted for the females of my ummah and forbidden for the males."
We do not need to look into the reasons behind every prohibition in Islam, but one reason why men should not wear silk is in order to avoid appearing extravagant, arrogant, and ostentatious.
Wearing gold. A common trend among young men that has developed is wearing a gold chain for a bracelet or necklace. As a general rule for both sexes, men should not dress in ways that resemble women's attire and women should not dress or wear their hair in ways that look like men.
Wearing gold is forbidden for men in Islam. Therefore, wearing a watch that is made of or even partially made of gold should be avoided as well.
Wearing short shorts. While many Muslim men are quick to scrutinize women and how well they are or are not covered, sometimes they forget that it is forbidden for men to wear clothes that expose what is between the naval and the knee. When playing sports, going to the gym or beach or pool, men should be careful to keep their shorts to the knee, not above the knee.
n Getting a tattoo. Just as it impermissible for women to get a tattoo, likewise it is impermissible for men.
Dying the hair or beard black. Some people are surprised to learn that in Islam, men can dye their graying hair or beard, but just be sure to avoid dying it black. Other colors are permissible.
Shaving the beard. Before addressing the rulings on grooming the beard, we must acknowledge a common stereotype that needs to be dismantled in our Muslim communities. Unfortunately, many Muslim men judge others by appearances. For example, they equate the level of faith and piety of a man depending on the length of his beard; they think that a man is a good Muslim if he has a long beard and a bad Muslim if he completely shaves his beard. The measure of a man's faith should depend on his connection to Allah, good character, and worship, not how long his beard is.
At the same time, we should also acknowledge that the beard was kept by all the Prophets that Allah sent; Abraham, Ishmael, Isaac, Moses, Aaron, Jesus, and Muhammad (peace be upon them all). As for the ruling in Islam, whether it is obligatory or recommended or strongly recommended, or sunnah, I will not get into the lengthy debate on this issue. I will suffice to state that Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) instructed his companions to trim the moustache and keep the beard. A Muslim man should not let his beard grow unruly and look unkempt, rather he is encouraged to groom it and keep it clean.
Attending Friday sermon and prayer without showering. The demands and hectic lifestyles in our modern world have left us very little time, and it seems like we are constantly rushing. Some Muslim men may be so busy that they make hasty preparations for Friday prayer, but this is incorrect.
The Friday prayer is a special ritual and there are specific guidelines that Muslim men must follow. Some scholars say that it is obligatory and others say that it is strongly recommended to take a shower before going to Friday prayers, rather than only making wudu. Brush your teeth, preferably using the siwak, and wear nice, clean, and neat clothes. When a man dresses so properly for a business meeting but shows up to the mosque for Friday prayer in a wrinkled t-shirt and mismatched pants, he should ask himself how important is the Friday prayer to him? Men should wear cologne or scented oils, and should plan to arrive to the mosque early, before the sermon begins.
Although these matters may seem small, when Muslim men and women dress in a certain way to please Allah, we hope that Allah will make our rewards ample.


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