It was a long and exhausting night in the hotel overlooking the Bosphorus. The lights in the suites of the leaders stayed on till dawn. Ahmet Davutoğlu went back and forth between the suites. Discord was finding its way around Lebanon, an omen of worst times to come. The Turkish foreign minister made a series of regional and international phone calls that helped him make rectifications and amendments. After huge efforts were deployed, a “creative solution” was reached and white smoke swirled upwards. Photographers frantically took pictures in the closing session. Their flashes covered the smiles of the poles of the Lebanese national dialogue. They succeeded in saving their country for the sake of which so many had died. They save it periodically. They relish reminding others of their ability to disassemble it and save it. Abdullah Gül and Recep Tayyip Erdoğan wait in an adjacent room for the commemorative picture to be taken. Davutoğlu read out loud the Istanbul agreement amidst the crowd of Lebanese, Arab and international media: - The parties gathered here call all fighters on the Lebanese territory, including uncontrolled elements, for an immediate comprehensive ceasefire and insist the Lebanese army respond firmly to any violation. They assure that the bloody misunderstanding between the March 14 and March 8 camps has definitely ended. They renew their attachment to the sovereignty of Lebanon, its unity, and its Arabism as well as their dedication to the unique coexistence experience that has kept it in the intensive care unit since its independence. - The signature of the parties on the Istanbul agreement is considered like a signature on a non-aggression pact among and inside the sects, communities, and parties. The Lebanese refrain from exchanging accusations of treason and wagering on the outside after it appeared that ‘all this cake is made from the same dough'. - The parties gathered here express their certitude that the Mossad was behind the assassination of Rafic Hariri and the other assassinations that followed or preceded it ever since Lebanon was established. They call Judge Belmar to make the Special Tribunal's decision reflect what the Lebanese have agreed upon. They call the Tribunal to issue a firm decision against Ariel Sharon, who has been in a prolonged coma. They call for turning the page of the past and making swift reconciliations, and urge the Lebanese to kiss less in order to prevent the spread of swine flu. - The Lebanese Resistance announces its strict adherence to Resolution 1701 and puts its deterring capacity at the disposal of the Lebanese State, which calls for a diplomatic battle in order to retrieve the remaining occupied land – as it is behind all war and peace decisions. - The parties gathered here discussed the issue of the presidential stubbornness and the complex of the palace that affects the leaders (and particularly Generals) of the honorable Maronite sect. In order to inject blood and ensure civil peace, the parties gathered reached a creative formula that can only be applied one non-renewable or repeatable time. According to this formula, General Michel Sleiman will act as President of the Republic five days a week and will leave the palace during the weekends to be replaced by General Michel Aoun according to a system that ensures the two Generals are never there at the same time. General Aoun pledges to throw away any depressive feelings and refrain from calling the Council of Ministers or resuming the “Elimination War” or the “Liberation War”. - Saad Hariri will establish a permanent final consensual government for any upcoming elections with a system for transferring a minister's portfolio to his son or son-in-law should anything happen to him, God forbid. - The President of the Republic's mandate may not be extended under any condition, even in case of a civil war. In order to keep the Lebanese army away from any presidential temptations, it shall be prohibited to elect a General as President under any condition, even if he were retired. - The parties gathered pay tribute to General Sleiman's refraining from proposing his son-in-law's name for any position and consider this to be an inviolable law. - The parties gathered discussed the complex issue of the future of Minister Gibran Bassil, which is no less sensitive or difficult than the complex issue of the future of Kirkuk in Iraq. As reparation for the Arab Christians for what they suffered in Iraq, and following their reduced presence in Palestine and their shrunken role in Lebanon, Bassil will be appointed as minister in the permanent government – regardless of his being General Aoun's son-in-law. He will be in charge of telecommunications, in order to improve communications with expatriates, especially the new incoming members of his sect. - The participants pledged to give absolute priority for dealing with the electricity issue in order to avoid seeing Lebanon drown in darkness and then having to fight in candlelight. The participants hugged each other with tears shining in their eyes. National unity was preserved, after the country and the citizens were shattered. They thanked the sultanate's pity for its citizens. The Lebanese are orphans who constantly need a guardian. Deputy Walid Jumblatt took pictures of the festive national unity. He decided to retire in Istanbul while the others went back to a failed country known as LEBANON.
