JEDDAH: A number of Saudi parents are forcing their daughters to marry, in direct contravention of Islamic law. This has resulted in an increase in divorces, reports from marriage officers and researchers said. Some parents have been justifying this behavior by arguing that their daughters do not know what they need or what is in their best interests. A distressed woman, M.N., said her father wants to marry her to a man she does not like. “He threatened to abuse me mentally and physically if I rejected the man. He justified his strange stance by saying he gave his word and that he will never go back on it. Tribal traditions give him this right but Islamic Shariah nullifies and prevents such marriages.” M.N. said she never thought in her wildest dreams she would be married to someone against her will. With tears rolling down her cheeks she said her father had destroyed her life and turned it into a living hell. “I am praying to Allah day and night before the marriage takes place. I cannot imagine I will live with a man I don't love.” Fatima is another woman who has a similar story. “I became nothing more than a profitable deal for my father. He married me to a filthy rich man who could be my grandfather. He bartered me for a huge bag of money. He sold me to this man in return for this bag of money which he will enjoy at the expense of his loving daughter. Believe it or not my husband is 50 years older than me. How can he live with a girl the age of his youngest grandsons?” Umm Muhammad is also leading a miserable life because she was married to her cousin she does not like. She said she is a victim of tribal tradition which has nothing to do with Islam. Some experts argue that this is the reason for the steady increase in divorce and disintegration of the family. A report by the Ministry of Justice shows there were 28,867 divorces in 2009, at a rate of 79 cases a day. These statistics have seen sociologists launch several studies into the root cause of the problem. Some found, however, that divorce can be attributed to physical and mental incompatibility between couples. They added that this can all be prevented if parents abide by Islamic teachings; and that such marriages eventually result in the children being affected the most. The victims of these marriages may grow up without mothers or fathers and could easily become delinquents. Dr. Ghazi Al-Shamari, Chairman of the Family Reconciliation Committee in the emirate, said those parents who force their daughters to marry against their will are ignorant. He said the committee has dealt with several cases where it had to revoke the marriage contracts of the young women and return the dowry taken by their parents. The committee also made the guardians sign an undertaken not to harass their daughters. “This does not mean that we give girls free rein to go out with anyone they want to, but it should be understood that forcing girls to marry against their will is not endorsed by the Shariah. The principle rules of marriage in Islam are compatibility and consent,” he said. He said forced marriages can never be happy unions. “The common elements for the success of any marriage are affection and tenderness. If any of these elements is missing the marriage will not last long.” Dr. Ahmad Al-Mabi, a Madhoun or marriage official, said these forced marriages are not spoken about openly. He has had several young women contact him because their guardians wanted to marry them against their will. “Some of the guardians even prevented them from getting married, which goes against the Shariah.” He said many guardians are blindly loyal to tribal traditions and force their daughters to marry their cousins and relatives without their consent. This is why there has been an increase in divorces and family's breaking up. He said parents should understand that a forced marriage is null and void in Islam and that an element of a sound marriage in Islam is the woman's consent.
