WHEN Yashi Gila's husband was offered a job in Saudi Arabia, they were living in Washington D.C. Yashi was working in the library at the Johns Hopkins International School so, knowing nothing about Saudi Arabia, she searched for a book on the country. “I read it and that gave me some idea of what to expect. I thought it would be a good challenge to live there. It was also encouraging that it was not too far from home – only a two-hour flight from Ethiopia. It made me feel that I would be closer to my mother and my sisters in Addis Ababa,” she said. Yashi grew up with her older brother in Addis Ababa in the home of her imperious paternal grandmother. “My father died before I was born, and my mother remarried and had six children. Our grandmother was a tough matriarch. Everybody shook when she was around. She took all her eight grandchildren and raised us under one roof. She was my role model and everything was decided by her. We had no grandfather as he had passed away, but we all loved her and after she left, we could all see why she did what she did. She was very disciplined and there was strict order in her house. My mother would visit us and take us out sometimes, but we were not allowed to leave the house for long.” When she was 17, Yashi was sent to Syracuse in up-state New York to continue her education. It seemed to me to be a quantum leap from the strict household of her grandmother in Africa to college life in the US, but Yashi took in all in her stride: “It was an experience,” she said laughing. “Everything was new – the weather, the food, people's behaviour. My brother went ahead of me so I did not go alone, and there were some cousins and friends that I had made in high school back in Ethiopia. We were all in the same boat, so I was not unhappy.” She completed a BA and a Masters in Social Work, and during her time at college, met her Ethiopian husband. They married and had two daughters and first came to Jeddah in 1993. She described her first impressions: “I had read that women have to be covered and that it was very strict, but I didn't take it seriously. When I actually saw it, I felt quite shocked. When I set my foot in the airport, and I saw a large group of men, I was taken aback and thought ‘This is a man's world!' It had a big impact on me.” The family settled quickly into their life in the compound and Yashi found that Saudi Arabia was a great place for expatriates to raise their children: “It is a rat race in the States with time and financial stress. One person's income is not enough there. The lifestyle here is kind of slow. I didn't have to spend so much money or look for a baby sitter or hire a maid – I stayed with my kids. So economically and emotionally, it was good for all of us. We all had more time to sit and talk and raise our kids. There was also less distraction because there are no movies or outside entertainment, so it was good,” she stated. Yashi enjoyed the freedom that compound life gave her although she has found that it isolates expatriates from the local community. “It is a protected way of life with advantages and disadvantages. I am the sort of person who likes to walk, run and cycle so I get the freedom to do so here. If I had lived in an apartment or villa outside, I don't think I would have had that freedom, but then I would have been forced to communicate with the locals and learn the language and make friends with them,” she said. Their social life has been with the multicultural expatriate community which Yashi feels has been very beneficial to her daughters: “They are well-rounded and adjusted easily to going to college in the States. They went to the International University where there are a lot of international people so it was easy for them to mingle because of the environment that they grew up in.” Yashi feels strongly that it is important for expatriate women to be able to work while they live in Saudi Arabia. “They need to be involved,” she explained. “Personal fulfilment is the number one reason. Work is very important to me, not only financially, but for my mental state, for my sanity! I think there is plenty of work here for expatriate women, but you have to be willing and not too picky about what you do – but at the same time, you have to enjoy what you are doing.” She initially worked as a kindergarten teacher at what was the Saudi Arabian Airlines School but what is now the American International School of Jeddah (AISJ). “Then I did a certificate in Sports Fitness and taught physical education to the middle school children aged between six and eight years old. As well as fitness classes, I used to coach basketball and volleyball, but now I focus on volleyball and I coach the all-girl soccer team in the Middle School. I am involved with their inter-Kingdom sports' events.” When her girls were at school in Jeddah, they traveled all over the Kingdom as well as to Syria and Egypt to play soccer against other international schools. There are a few things that Yashi really misses when she is in Jeddah: “I miss driving big time!” she said emphatically. “I really miss the freedom to just get up and go! My dream car is a 4x4 Range Rover. I also really miss going to the movies. When we are out of Jeddah, I also like the freedom to make eye contact with people and say ‘hi' – people greet you and I enjoy the more open communication in general among people.” Like many expatriates, Yashi and her family are not sure where to go when they leave Jeddah. “Home is where your pillow is, so this is home now and I really enjoy it. When I am away, I miss the relaxing atmosphere and I have time to read here. We have a home in Addis Ababa, but we will go wherever our kids are going to be, and right now they are in the States.”
