Divorce In accordance with Islam and Shariah law, in the event of divorce, a man is required to provide three months (90 days) of “maintenance” to the wife. In the US and other Western countries the word maintenance would be substituted with alimony. However, let's just think about whether 90 days of maintenance is fair in Saudi Arabia. A Saudi woman, in most cases, will go directly from her family's home to her husband's home after marriage. Many Saudi women, who go from being a daughter to being a wife, have limited life experiences and may have never worked, let alone acquire, a professional skill. Also, the Saudi culture and tradition strongly encourages and expects a couple to have a child within the first year of marriage. Therefore, it is not surprising in the case of a divorce, that young children will remain with their mother. Thankfully, Saudi culture is strong for family to take care of blood relations. In most cases, a Saudi woman, whose marriage is broken, will be able to return to her family. But is that fair to her? Is that what she wants, instead of making her own home for her and her children? A woman, with no marketable job skills and with young children, may not have a lot of options. Against that backdrop, a three-month maintenance may not be enough, considering that she has to rebuild her life. On the other hand, there are many Saudi couples who choose not to live together, although not officially divorced. In this case the woman usually has her own home separate from the estranged husband and would not move back to her family. She may or may not work. She is independent but not viewed as a divorced woman. Her family name and reputation remains intact whereas a divorced woman can be looked upon with a stigma. This woman will likely have accepted the situation and is content with her children and her extended family. She enjoys her freedom from the daily expectation of a husband. Which is better? Deciding not to get a divorce but live separate lives? Or getting a divorce, accept 90 days of maintenance and going back to her family? - americanbedu Worrying The harm that worry causes in our lives has been well documented by health professionals and others. Worry can weaken and sicken us, and make our days unbearable. At the very least, it prevents us from living fully and happily. At its worse, it can destroy us. “It steals the bloom from the cheek and lightness from the pulse; it takes away the appetite and turns the hair gray,” says Benjamin Disraeli. It does a lot more than that, Benjamin! But the worry disease can be cured and certainly can be reduced. Of course it requires a change in our way of thinking - how to view and react to situations. Worrying over things that ‘might' happen can waste large portions of our lives, considering that so often it is for nothing, and almost certainly does no good. “If you can solve your problem, then what is the need of worrying? If you cannot solve it, then what is the use of worrying?” - Shantideva Worrying about things that have happened will not turn back the hands of time to give you another try at doing it right. So that is a waste of time. Many of our anxieties and fears are for nothing. Most can simply be discarded because worrying isn't going to do any good. So let's spend our time thinking about the good and pleasant things in our lives, and move on with a peaceful and contented state of mind. “I think these difficult times have helped me to understand better than before how infinitely rich and beautiful life is in every way and that so many things that one goes around worrying about are of no importance whatsoever.” - Isak Dinesen A program to become knowledgeable on the subject of worry, through reading and other instruction, can help in turning our lives around. A life filled with contentment and lacking stress and worry are the goals to be achieved. It's never too late to start eliminating worry.
