Several cases of incompatible marriage have come to light of late, where relatives of either of the two parties have questioned the solemn ceremony binding the two families together. All of a sudden, several tribes appear to have awakened to the fact that certain marriages lacked the required tribal origins and were incompatible with their status in society. And in a bid to rectify what they see as mistakes, they have rushed to the courts to ask that the marriages be declared null and void without thinking of the consequences and without realizing that they are helping to create many broken homes. Saudi Gazette met a Saudi couple who were forced to divorce because of the inequality in their origins. They described their sufferings, after, of course, requesting anonymity for fear of further persecution at the hands of tribal elders. “I am 36. I was divorced five years ago when my family suddenly discovered that my marriage with my ex-husband was unacceptable to them,” said a Saudi woman. “My family lodged a complaint against my husband in the court, and the judge forced him to divorce me. However, my husband and I still believe in our marriage and we refuse to leave each other,” she said. The woman said she met her husband after the divorce in an apartment in Jeddah. But to their horror, they discovered that the police were watching them. “They arrested us and sent me to Dammam prison where I spent nine months with my two children,” the woman said. The Saudi husband also talked to Saudi Gazette and complained about the unfair treatment meted out to him. “I want my wife and son to come back to me. We need to live with each other as a family. In Islam all that is required for a marriage is having good morals and religion, and nothing else,” he said. “I took my daughter from her mother to live with me. Obviously she could not live in prison with her mother. I am broke and live on charity from my friends. Strangely, the Ministry of Social Affairs has decided not to give me a monthly payment for unspecified reasons,” he said. Religious experts confirm the necessity of taking the judge's opinion into account and of following Islamic rules and regulations. “This case is complicated. Couples should realize that they are divorced and that they cannot meet unless they get married again with a new marriage contract and witnesses,” said Sheikh Asem Al-Hakim, Imam of Ja'fer Al-Tayyar Mosque. According to Al-Hakim, all people are required to respect the decision that has been issued by the court even if the mufti's opinion is totally different. “The judge's decision has priority and should be followed even though the mufti's opinion is different,” he said. Islam has put forth two important requirements for those who want to get married – being morally and religiously acceptable. If the man satisfies these two requirements, the woman's family cannot refuse him, added Al-Hakim. In the past such cases were rare, but now things have changed for a number of reasons. “Saudi society has different traditions, most of which had disappeared for a period of time. Recently, however, the media has played an important role in bringing these traditions to light,” said Dr. Mansour Bin Askar, Professor of Sociology at King Saud University in Riyadh. According to Bin Askar, after the media turned the spotlight on these traditions, the tribes started to enforce their original rules regarding marriage and many other issues.
