IN this final part of the series, Sadaq Farooqi writes some more steps to stem the disease of arrogance and increase humility. Admit your mistakes It might take a huge effort at first, but try to develop humility by hearing the other person out, even if you are right or better in opinion. Develop the ability to look at things from their point of view, which will make you a gentler and more empathetic person; more approachable and likeable. Also, if you are among the older generation (say, above 50) and for the most part of your life, you have been telling the younger lot what to do and how to do it, accede to the fact that now they are adults; maybe acknowledging your own shortcomings before them, and occasionally acquiescing to their wishes won't really belittle you before them. On the contrary, it might just make you more honorable. Be quick to apologize It takes a lot of strength to not just admit your mistake, but to go one step ahead and apologize to those you've wronged, whether it happened intentionally or not. Asking another person to forgive you is a sign of humility, one that very few strong individuals can muster up the guts to acquire. Befriend poor people A humble person always compares himself to those lower than him in worldly status. For this reason, he is constantly concerned about their well-being and prosperity. Think: “If we can not afford a rented apartment, what about those who are homeless?” You will find humble people sharing their meals with the poor, giving away clothes to them, paying their medical bills, or often asking about their well-being. In short, instead of always spending time with the elite at lavish soirees featuring arrays of expensive food, couture and decor, eat at times vegetables on bran whilst sitting on the floor with servants. Greet people first “So-and-so's daughter is such a Miss high-and-mighty! What does she think of herself? Whenever she sees me, she averts her eyes. She doesn't greet me, even though I am old enough to be her mother.” Maybe you can teach her what she's missing by practicing what you preach? What's stopping you from greeting her with a warm, motherly smile? The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “Do not disdain any good deed, even your meeting with your brother (Muslim) with a cheerful face.” (Sahih Muslim) Remember your origin “Was he not a Nutfah (mixed male and female discharge of semen) poured forth? Then he became a clot; then (Allah) shaped and fashioned (him) in due proportion.” (Qur'an, 75:37-38) The IslamQA team bluntly describes this: “Another remedy (for arrogance) is to remember that he and urine came out of the same place; that he began as a despised drop of sperm and he will end up as a rotten corpse, and that in between he is a vessel for feces. So what does he have to feel so proud and arrogant about?!” Take account Every day, when you retire for the night, mentally recount how many wrong things you did during the day. After that, proceed to sincerely ask Allah for forgiveness. This daily activity will ensure that you stay focused on your own errors and weaknesses, paving the way for consistent humility and a gentler attitude towards the mistakes of others. Humility: Path to Paradise Allah's Messenger (peace be upon him) said, “Shall I not inform you about those who are entitled to Paradise? It is every person who is modest and humble (before Allah), a person who is accounted weak and is looked down upon, but if he swears (hoping for Allah's Bounty), Allah will certainly give him what he desires. Now shall I not inform you about the inmates of Hell? It is every violent, impertinent and proud man.” (Al-Bukhari and Muslim) Allah says: “Whosoever desires honor, power and glory then to Allah belong all honor, power and glory (and one can get honor, power and glory only by worshipping Allah Alone).” (Qur'an, 35:10)
