Dr. Khaled M. Batarfi I was on a live Panorama FM program. The issue was women driving. My callers were mostly against, and were all ... men. The interviewer and I were reminding women to please call in — we need to hear your voice. None did! After the program, we were discussing why so many women were either passive or against women rights. I told my colleagues of a childhood experience: Once my family had pigeons in a large wooden cage. I felt that was imprisonment. Pigeons were created as birds, so they could fly. They were made free and free they should be. Finally, my siblings were persuaded with my logical and passionate arguments. That afternoon we decided to let them go. We were excited as we climbed to the roof and opened the cage gate and run, for we expected them to flew all at once in our faces. They didn't. So we thought they were afraid of us, and hid. We waited and waited till night. They didn't even come close to the door of their “prison”. Finally, we gave up and left. The next morning they were all gone! I never stopped thinking why they hesitated to flee until it hit me. They were kept behind bars for so long. Freedom for them was a foreign concept. They never knew they have the right to be free, to start with. And maybe they forgot or didn't know how to manage their lives if they were on their own. Here, they had traded their freedom with security and free “room service.” Out there ... who knew what awaited them! They must have discussed it all night, then finally some brave leader convinced them to take the risk. Or it could be their nature that had finally awaken. Birds were born free. It is in their nature to fly but they were afraid of us. They must have seen us hiding and watching. At night, they may thought we were still there. In the morning they became sure our offer was for real, and no one was out there to hunt or punish their free spirit. Maybe a combination of some or all of the above were the reasons for their hesitance ... or wisdom! It could be so with our women. We all know what happened to the first pioneers who advocated women driving. Fascists hunted them to this date. They were made to be examples for the rest of the “pigeon” population. Even in this age, female women-right advocates can be harshly punished. Brave ones are still fighting the cause. Some of them were appointed in the Shoura Council and high public and corporate positions. They are more prominent in the media and has more say in their own affairs. Still, however, most advocates are male. We are accused, even by some women, of being more royalist than the royals. “Who authorized you to speak on our behalf? A small minority of liberals did? Or are you trying to corrupt our Islamic conservative society for personal gains?,” our detractors would question us. “If you and your Western masters believe in democracy, then you must accept the majority's wishes. Most of us do not agree with your devilish agenda. So just leave us alone — and if you don't like our way of life, go and live were it suits you to.” It is tough to represent silent victims. You do need authorization and backup to legitimize your fight. Women abuses are many. A new law protecting women and children against domestic violence is a milestone. But still we have a long way to go. For example, underage marriage is still legal and many girls are not allowed to choose their marriage partners. Others were forced to divorce them later, for not being equal in tribal hierarchy. The problem is too many rights are given to the male guardian. Most are not Islamic. A lady doctor, graduate of a top British medical school, complains: “After all my achievements, I still need a guardian permission to work, travel or participate in academic and professional seminars and conferences. I regard myself lucky, though. A doctoral student couldn't finish her studies because the husband insisted that her dissertation advisor must be female, even though none was available in the college. Another had to go down a level, because the jealous husband wouldn't let her study in a different class than his, and his was lower.” Yes, she is luckier than many. Others couldn't even study abroad because the girl can't find a guardian welling to travel with her, or even accept the idea of women studying abroad. All the above issues cannot be raised without women speaking out. Modern communication tools are more open, wide and available today than ever. If traditional media seemed out of reach, then Facebook, Twitter and electronic journals and blogs are at your service —for free. Our elected female members of corporations and chambers of commerce, as well as the Shoura Council, writers and journalists can and should voice out women grievances and demands. We, gentlemen, will always back them up, but ... Ladies should speak first. — Dr. Khaled M Batarfi can be reached at [email protected] and followed on Twitter: @kbatarfi
