JEDDAH – Struggling with drug addiction anywhere in the world is a major challenge in itself, but in Saudi Arabia it is probably even worse. With the lack of proper rehabilitation centers and support sessions, it is not so hard to hit rock bottom. This is what Muneera (not her real name), a 36-year-old woman who has been clean now for three years after being addicted for more than 15 years, found out. Speaking about rehabilitation centers in hospitals here, Muneera said they were ineffective. She said: “Parents who find out that their sons or daughters are taking drugs, the first thing they do after admitting them into rehab is ask to change their names. These centers give medication and do not focus on the process of recovery. Recovery is a long process; for example, a drug addict going through rehab shouldn't work or mingle with a lot of people in the first year, as if he or she is newly born.” During her addiction years, she described herself as “garbage” feeding on toxins. Muneera started taking drugs when she was around 19. “The addiction was gradual. Drinking and smoking hashish are part of an addiction but the moment you sniff cocaine, that's the turning point in your life,” she said. “My choice of drug was cocaine. I was like garbage, I took everything.” Drugs took her to a different world. She added: “When I used to feel down for any reason, such as when I had a fight with my family, I used to keep my feelings inside and look for something to numb those feelings. This is when the gap widens and you look for things to fill that void.” According to statistics, many people who struggle emotionally also struggle with substance abuse. Over half of people who struggle with addiction have a diagnosed mental illness such as depression, anxiety or bipolar disorder. Muneera claims children in this society grow up not knowing how to deal with their feelings and emotions. She said: “These are things I learned during my rehabilitation. When I went to rehab, I stayed one month in Saudi Arabia and four months in Cairo. It took me five months to finally admit that I was a drug addict.” She believes all addicts have common reasons to take drugs, mostly related to family. Not accepting yourself or feeling that you are not accepted by your peers can lead to drug addiction, Muneera believes. She added: “I was young and very shy so drugs gave me courage. I was isolated, couldn't confront anyone or express my feelings. So, I took drugs for those reasons. Growing up in a strict environment and with limited outlets created feelings of boredom and resentment.” Four years ago, she hit rock bottom, taking drugs daily. She said: “I always carried pills with me. My file at the hospital was marked for doctors not to give me any kind of drugs such as morphine.” But one day, she decided enough was enough and it was time for a new life. Since rehab programs here were not helpful, her family sent her to the US where her spiritual journey started. Now instead of seeing herself as “garbage,” she is “newborn”. She said addiction is a disease and does not have anything to do with bad manners or bad upbringing. “Addiction is a mental, physical and spiritual disease.” In the US, Muneera went to rehab in a village. The program started with detox for two weeks, rehab for a month and after rehab patients stayed at so-called halfway houses. Muneera added: “You live at the halfway house for a year. In the beginning you are isolated from the outside world, then slowly they try to blend you in with the outside world. “For example, a counselor goes with you to visit your family or find you a job. Slowly they take you back to normal living and mingling with people.” This program is called the Twelve-Step Program and is only available for men in Saudi Arabia. She added: “The program that I personally benefitted from and I see as effective is only available at Aramco Hospital for men. It operates three times a week with more focus on religion than spirituality.” The program incorporates a set of guiding principles (accepted by members as “spiritual principles”, based on the approved literature), outlining a course of action for recovery from addiction. As summarized by the American Psychological Association, the process involves admitting that one cannot control one's addiction, recognizing a higher power that can give strength, examining past errors with the help of a sponsor, making amends for these errors, learning to live a new life with a new code of behavior and helping others who suffer from the same addictions. The reason behind this program is to undergo a radical change. She said: “The core of the program is to be honest, honest with yourself before anyone or anything else. “Now, I'm part of the herd. Before doing anything I call my friends who give me support and guide me around when needed. “The magic is when they give me their opinion and I do it, it works. “For example, I call one of my friends in the program when I'm angry and about to do something crazy, so she tells me to wait, organize my closet and call her back. “Your day passes without doing something you regret, plus you feel good about yourself.” There are five daily elements of the program: call the sponsor, meditate, pray, read any literature and share. Muneera added: “Now, I have friends from all the countries in the world that use this program. There is a hotline I can call if I have any problems.” She also thinks rehab centers in the Kingdom are useless and having halfway houses is a must so women can get support. She added: “Detoxing isn't the only thing a drug addict needs. I tried having meetings in my house; my family was very supportive because they have seen a different person since I came back from rehab.I stopped the meetings because I had some issues with some people.” To open a halfway house here would not be acceptable for most families because they fear for their reputation, Muneera believes. She said: “My family tried to hide my addiction but no matter how much they tried, people finally found out. Here in Saudi Arabia we don't have rehab. They still focus on the religious side more than the psychological.I went to Al-Amal Hospital trying to set up some sort of collaboration for the Twelve-Step Program but they were uncooperative and looked down on me because I'm an ex-addict, not knowing that the only person who can help a drug addict recover is an ex-addict who has been through the same experience.” Muneera is now clean and sober. She is currently working on a book on her recovery process and how she spent what she calls her “past life”. She added: “Writing was given to me as a gift from God. When you leave something bad, you will be rewarded and Allah rewarded me with the gift of writing. If you are clean, everything around you will become clean.”