Young women or teenage girls running away from home are quite often heard about in Western societies, but never in a Saudi society. However, some recent incidents prove otherwise, although there are no statistics to support this rapidly increasing and disturbing phenomenon. Social workers and police officers have identified a number of reasons behind girls and young women running away from home, such as family dispute, lack of communication between family members, or broken families. A divorced woman who referred to herself as R.A. told Al-Riyadh newspaper, “I ran away from my house because of my mother and brother's coarse treatment toward me. In the beginning, I left the house with no clear plan in mind. After calling my best friend who knew about my ordeal, she informed me that her family had agreed to welcome me into their home on one condition: that I do not tell my family where I am staying to avoid any trouble that my brother might cause them. What upset and puzzled me the most was that when I contacted my mother she said that my brother was not even concerned or worried about my whereabouts.” Another young woman, S.M told the tragic story of her friend. “My friend was engaged to be married and they even signed the marriage contract in court. Unfortunately, just before the wedding date the young lady's parents and her fiancé's parents disagreed on certain issues. A battle was ensued between the two families and they pressurized the young couple to part. The young bride-to-be refused to break up with her fiancé so they decided to secretly leave their families and live together, since they were already married according to Islamic law. When she went missing, her parents left no stone unturned until they found their daughter. “The girl's father then forced her to return to her family's home and file for divorce. Heartbroken, she did as she was told, but she has refuses to marry again.” Women as young as 15 are looking for respite outside their parents' home. “Our classmate was absent for a number of days and when she finally got back to school, she had a forlorn look on her face. Her sister who was in grade 10 ran away from home without leaving any clue as to where she had gone. One month later, her parents discovered that their missing daughter was in another city with a young man. The girl's parents refused to contact her or even acknowledge her as their daughter so as to avoid bringing shame to the family,” a high school student told Al-Riyadh newspaper. A psychiatrist in Madinah, Dr. Ahmad Hafez, urged society members to draw a line between those young women who are confused and disturbed about their situation at home due to unbearable behavior of family members, and those who have a deviant behavior. Family members should keep the channels of communication open with each other and media should help create social awareness on the subject. “Many adolescent girls run away from home, seeking a safe haven because they are victims of physical and emotional abuse, negligence, or constant quarreling at home. Parents should be particularly attentive to and gentle with their teenage daughters because girls at this age experience radical hormonal, physical, and emotional changes that some may have difficulty understanding and coping with. It is the parents' responsibility to help provide emotional security and a sense of safety and stability in the home and to help meet their children's needs,” said Dr. Hafez. He further said, “As for girls who run away with no reasonable justification, the main culprits are ignorance, lack of religious teachings, bad company, peer pressure, and inadequate parental supervision. Parents, schools, and social organizations must educate young girls about our religion and warn them of the dangers they may face as a result of running away.” According to a consultant psychiatrist and family counselor, Dr. Khalid Muhammad Bahadhek, in the majority of cases, lack of emotional acceptance and love is what drives children to run away from home. “For many young women who are exposed to recurrent physical and/or verbal abuse, fear of the known is more intense than fear of the unknown, and they will take the risk of running away just to escape the suffering at home. The social organizations to deal with and help girls in such situations in the Kingdom are painfully insufficient. The few available are also not of help as they only provide temporary relief to the distraught girl, after which she is forcefully returned back to her family or is jailed if she refuses to go home. We are in need of safe shelters to house and care for young women who have run away from home. In addition, abusive family members should receive counseling and rehabilitative services before the abused girl is sent back,” said Dr. Bahadhek. Social worker Sameera Hamza said, “Lack of better judgment coupled with harsh treatment from both or either parent, exaggerated punishments for mistakes, and absence of communication in the family, are the key forces behind the trend of adolescent girls running away from home. What the younger generation needs is a good role model, a mentor, and a confidante, someone wise and mature with whom they can share their secrets and trust, whom they can turn to when confused, hurt, or experiencing problems. This person can be the girl's mother, elder sister, teacher, school counselor, or aunt.” Parents do not deprive their children of their physical needs, for example, food, clothing, and cleanliness, but many unfortunately fail to fulfill their children's emotional and mental needs, which is equally important. –
