Girls aware of the growing divorce rate in the Kingdom are making sure that their marriage contract leaves no room for any break-up. In fact, they are demanding high dowries and placing impracticable conditions in their marriage contracts, Arabic daily Al-Watan reported. But the fact is that a Muslim woman has the right to set her terms in a marriage contract and that this right cannot be denied, Ahmed Al-Amri, marriage official and Imam and Khateeb of Al-Sa'adah Grand Mosque in Jeddah, told the paper. But he cautioned that unrealistic conditions could lead to problems between couples and eventually divorce. “Some place a condition of SR100,000 as deferred dowry (mu'akhar sadaaq) to guarantee that their husbands do not leave them,” said Al-Amri. “Others ask for a villa in their name, an amount of money in their bank account, and a car with driver. Hence only financially capable suitors will be able to agree to conditions.” Some women also put a condition that the man must not marry another woman although Allah has permitted polygamy for men, the Imam added. Al-Amri's job includes registering marriage contracts. He said the highest dowry he has registered was SR1 million and the least was a copy of the Holy Qu'ran. He said some girls set ordinary terms and only sought a good married life. Al-Amri narrated a strange case involving a Saudi man who telephoned him and asked him to officiate in his marriage. When he arrived at the girl's house, he discovered that she was a Moroccan housemaid. The man insisted that the marriage contract be concluded with her sponsor, who was present, as her guardian giving her away. But Al-Amri refused. In one of the incidents, a man did not present his pre-marriage medical test. Hence, Al-Amri could not conclude the marriage contract. As for a woman's right to divorce, Al-Amri cited a ruling (fatwa) issued by the late Sheikh Abdul Aziz Bin Baz, Grand Mufti of the Kingdom, that said women should not have the right to divorce. However, if the man relinquishes his right and allows the woman to demand divorce, then it is permissible. Fatima Al-Zahrani, a teacher, was one woman who asked for too much in her marriage contract, the paper said. Among her many demands were a house in her name, a private driver and a housemaid. But her steep conditions led to problems during the engagement period, which eventually ended the marriage contract. Nearly 62 percent of Saudi marriages reportedly end in divorce, and the Shoura Council is considering a draft law to prevent the growing divorce rate. There are more than 1.5 million spinsters – or women past their prime for marriage – in the country. It is unclear whether this high number is because women are unduly demanding in their terms for marriage. The late Sheikh Bin Othaimeen, a senior scholar, had advised that the most important attributes a woman must look for in selecting a husband are character and piety. “A well behaved and pious man will not wrong his wife,” the Sheikh had said. “He will either keep her in the proper way or leave her to go free in the best way.” He also said, “Marriage with less financial burden has the greatest blessing.” Dr. Sulaiman Al-Sanee', a sociology researcher, said: “Some guardians place hard conditions and spoil or prevent the marriage. This increases the percentage of spinsterhood in the society and results in increase of social ills.” He added, “if they want to see their daughters happy and well, they should make matrimonial matters easy when a suitable suitor comes forward.” Al-Sanee' said that polygamy, when looked into deeply, was not a problem in itself. “The setback is in the way of life. If the husband treats his wives justly and equally there wouldn't be many problems.” __
